Besides all the parenting, travelling and fashion blogs here, I decided to bring out another activity that can help new and old couples improve their relationships. Despite being exhausted by the end of the day and barely having any time for ourselves, we need to take a break, sometimes, for our inner selves and know what our bodies crave. You can probably take time out for a couple trip or weekend and carry out the massage session. Trust me, you will not regret it!
It is always better to keep your accessories ready. Basic things that you will need are massage oil/lotion and your palms. You can even use normal olive oil or coconut oil, if easily available. But discuss with your partner about the massage oil preferred. You can add a few drops of clove oil to warm up whichever massage oil you use. There are plenty of massage stones and equipment in the market but none can emit the natural warmth that your palms can. Soft pillows are suggested so their necks are not strained. And, they will feel safer when you cover the areas you are not or have finished massaging, with towels.
Grooming yourself would be a good idea because none of us appreciate a shabby massage therapist, do we? Though you will mostly use your thenar and thumb to rub, make sure to chip all your nails so you don’t wind up poking or scratching your partner. Your knuckles are a good option too. Also, bathe, smell good and put on some loose but less clothing yourself, like a silk nightie, some lacy lingerie or, if you’re a guy, mere briefs.
The idea is to connect with your partner physically and emotionally. You do not need a huge room to pamper someone. As long as there is enough space for them to lie down comfortably, you can continue. Keep the sheets clean so that no unwanted particles stick to the oily body. Light mildly scented candles around the room in safe places or just dim the lights a little bit (in case there is no safe place for the candles). Make sure the room is at a pleasant temperature; not cold and not too hot or stuffy. You can play light soulful music, preferably without words, at a low decibel. Make sure to keep enough music on your playlist to last until you are done or just do a repeat on loop. Avoid playing directly from the internet due to advertisements and Wifi cuts that can spoil the moment.
Let your partner undress and lie face down and make sure he/she is at ease with the pillows. Place the towel to cover their body from neck to toe. Make light conversation by asking if he/she is comfortable with the temperature and the pillows. Always pour a little oil onto your palms and rub it to warm up the oil/lotion before it touches your partner’s body. Make sure NOT to spray or pour the oil directly on the body at any point during the sensual body massage session.
Now comes the exciting part. Remember, it is desirable to repeat each action 8 times slowly and patiently.
i) Start with the shoulders and the nape. The first few touches should be long, lingering and purposeful. Massage gently behind the shoulders and nape in circular motion and rub over the shoulder bones to ease the tensed muscles. After that, sit lightly on their buttocks with your legs on either sides and rub the lower back in circles. Then, stretch and climb upwards with your elbows pressing on each step. Repeat and make sure to check with your partner if the overall pressure is fine before turning them over.
ii) Once they are lying on their backs, place their head on your legs and start with running your fingers through their hair and pulling firmly. Then, mildly rub the middle of the forehead in circular motion. As you will need only one hand for this, use your other hand to slightly press the jawline down to the chin. Then, with both hands gently squeeze the earlobes between your thumbs and forefingers and run through the lining of the ears a few times. Lightly massage around the chest and move over to the arms.
iii) Grip one step at a time from wrist to elbow and then rub upward till the shoulder. Cross both the arms and pull for 5 seconds in opposite directions.
iv) After this, cover the upper body again and run your fingers lightly till the legs. Remember to cover the other limb while you’re working on one of them. Repeat the same massage method for the legs (step by step grip hold from the ankle to the knee and then rub upwards till the thigh joint). Also, make sure to massage the back of the thighs and knees.
v) Rub the soles of their feet and inner palms, too. Press each toe and finger mildly and work a little on the ankles and wrists. You can do this between massaging the arms and legs or after massaging the legs. See pictures for more information on where you can put pressure on palms and feet.
vi) Then, sit lightly on the pelvic bone, without letting all your weight crush anything. Massage the stomach in an up and down motion.
vii) To finish, cover their whole body and, over the towel, press, knead and roll your thumbs around the pelvic area in circles and rub along the thigh joints. Slowly, slide your hands under the towel and repeat this action.
While a massage is meant to loosen tension and relieve physical pain, it can also help unblock your mind. A sensual body massage, on the other hand, is widely known as the most luxurious form of foreplay. But, whatever you decide to do after this is totally up to you and your partner! Nevertheless, be confident, have fun and enjoy this activity as a couple! You can end it with a hot shower together.
Have you tried following the steps above to give you partner a sensual body massage? How has it worked for you? Do you massage your partner in another way? I would love to know your thoughts on this couple activity.
Photo by Anna Tarazevich